Resume of the PHASSTTTTT bowler: Shoiab Akhtar

[SS_kiJaiHo]

How would Akhtar's resume look like ? What would he say about himself to a prospective employer or a school ?

__________________________________________________ _____
Shoaib Akhtar
114 (Opp to Hakim?s house), Dope Bazaar, Rawal Pindi, Pakistan
cell-1: 499-443767 (for Indian sponsors only)
cell-2: 499-567412 (Bollywood babes, please call me!)
tel: 6784321 (for Hakim: If you are unable to reach me, leave the packet at my door)
e-mail: showape@gmail.com (PCB bashtards just email me)

Objective

* I want to ball the fashtest ball and exshite people.
* I alsho want to be a legaan.d
* For a shange I wanna ban shomebody

Academics

Education

M. C La?hore University, Math Arrears pending
B. C. Pindi Unversity, Physhix Arrears pending.

Test scores

Chukcing test: Phailed first attempt. Passhed by 1 degree in second attempt.
Dope test: Failed Furst time, but Passhed tesht next time.
IQ: Not applicable

Awards and Honors

* Fashtest baller
* Highesht number of bans
o Banned for smoking in elementary school
o Banned for copying exam in high school
o Banned for balling by ICC (thanks Dalmiya for reverting ban)
o Banned for not balling (what can I do, I wash injured!) by PCB
o Banned for tumpering ball by ICC chootiya$
o Banned for dope abushe from ICC CT
o Latest ban for whooping Ashif

* Spheshal award from Shewag for being the kindest baller.
* For ninth conshecutive year, voted by PCB as ?outshtanding? playar.

Greatest Strengths

* Can ball fasht
* Great interpershonal skillsh. (ashk: Ashif, Inshi, Woolmer & PCB)
* Down to earth (when bowling to Shewagh)
* Greatast Match whinnah
* High kwality kriket brain. (Coached Sami)

Work Experience (Total: 9 yearsh)

* My recaard spheak for itshelf.

References
1)Shami
2)Inshi
3)Ashif

[sam123456789]

Was OK, tfs anyway.

[-RS-]

lmaooo good one phassssssssssssst ya phatuuu bowler ?

[AsphyxiateD]

[aaz97]

Could have been better.

[RuB3N]

[Jignesh812]

gud 1 dude
Gr8test strenght
"Down to earth (when bowling to Shewagh)".......hahahahaha

[nyqnzguju]

[shashankbhalla]

[axxo_cool]

huh..boring

[Wassi]

tfs

[dumbguy]

Chuck de

[SS_kiJaiHo]

Originally Posted by axxo_cool

huh..boring

what your e-personality? yea, we know.

[MahaKaal88]

Preety Neat